Big Sister Nanami
by itako
Summary: One shot on Nanami sniff About her time through the entire game. Not the ENTIRE of course but yanno :3. I'm rather happy with this fic!


Okay. This was written after I replayed Suikoden II for the hundredth time and finished it the right way :3. Happee~

I idolize Nanami so I decided a fic about her would be fitting. A little one shot ode to Nanami

**Big Sister Nanami**

_Let's run away Riou! Anywhere! Wherever it may be!_

I confidently said those words. But now when I recall them, it sounds so bitter. And the Little Brother never listened to the Big Sister. But he trusted her. When the Big Sister and the Little Brother was with Grandpa Genkaku, it was a sweet small family. The Big Sister was taught to be strong, despite her sex. The Little Brother was taught to be kind and honest. And when the Little Brother met Jowy, they became friends.

It was a sweet friendship; I remember Riou returning home, all bruised and dirty. I shook him hard, angry for the stains all over his shirt. But he laughed. He smiled to me and said _I'm sorry Nanami. We lost again._

Riou was teased on. He was small and timid. But he cared for the people close to him. When Jowy was teased on, when he was bullied for being the 'rich kid', Riou stood up and said _Don't pick on him._

Of course they were beaten up, sometimes coming home with terrible hurts. I was always angry when I wasn't there. Usually when I was there, I'd chase the bullies. But when they were alone, and they were hurt, I almost cried to see them. They weren't strong, but they shone brightly. Grandpa Genkaku wouldn't say anything usually. Sometimes I saw him smile at Riou and Jowy's friendship. He said that it reminded him of something long ago.

I found myself envying the relationship; that they were always happy together. And I felt sort of left out sometimes. I wished I had met someone like that. A person who I was friends with; and whispered secrets to. But I never did. All the females in the village found it vulgar to practise martial arts. And I was once again alone.

I remember in the orphanage, I was found crying. My parents died sometime in the war and I couldn't find them. One day, the lady said to me that there was someone who wanted to be my parents. I screamed at first. I threw things, I yelled. _No one can replace my parents! _I ran back into the rooms. The people who were in there flied out, aware of my temper. I cried and I sat on the bed, hugging my knees.

Grandpa Genkaku walked in and I looked up. I knew he was the man trying to adopt me. But I didn't want him. I just didn't. I didn't try to think why. My mother died of childbirth and my father died in the war. So why would I remember any memories of them? Was it just because I was foolish? To think that blood was everything in a family? He sat next to me but said nothing. He looked 30 or so, maybe older. His face had many scars. I looked at him curiously, unaware that he ignored me despite the fact he knew I was examining him. I wondered to my self, why did this man have so many scars? Did the war hurt him really badly? He didn't say anything. And I sat quietly. Soon the sun set, and he looked at me. He smiled and patted me on the head. A woman came in, carrying a bundle of blankets. And she handed it to Grandpa Genkaku, telling him something. He looked at the bundle and said _Nanami look._

I slowly moved closer, curious of what this bundle was. He moved it to me and I peered in. A baby was there, peacefully sleeping. _This baby's parents abandoned this child. They had no money to support him. They only just found him recently. This child will grow up motherless. But I want you to look after him. _He placed him in my arms. I looked at his calm resting face. Tears filled my eyes. That he would never know that his parents abandoned him. I wanted to care for this child. He was so innocent. _I'll look after him! I'll love him more than his parents ever will! _I'd make this child's parents wish they had kept him…

_Will we ever come back to Kyaro?_

Riou reassured me and said Yes, I wanted to cry, but it'd be foolish for the big sister to cry. Grandpa Genkaku would've looked down on me and tell me _Nanami, you are foolish to think this is the worst in the world. _I blinked back my tears and smiled. Of course we would be back, we had to. 

As we waited outside Muse for Jowy, I thought he'd never come. I thought he died. But he couldn't. I knew what would happen if he came back. He'd be welcomed and we'd hug him. But if he didn't, what would we do? The feeling choked me so much. Riou came and I smiled. His devotion to Jowy was always honest and they showed they were friends in many ways. And Jowy came back. Riou was almost a good luck charm to us.

I knew there was something wrong with Jowy. Riou and Pilika did too. It was obvious. But the answer for it wasn't clear. But he shrugged it off. I wanted to hug him close and tell him that whatever was bothering him, we're here to fight it. But all I could do was just… Watch. I was helpless and I watched it like a movie. As Lady Anabelle was murdered, and Jowy stood by her with a knife. I couldn't believe it then. I refused to think that Jowy killed her. It was impossible. He was Jowy. He couldn't do this. And as Riou and Pilika fell asleep outside Muse. I sat up and looked at the stars. The were extremely bright, like a fire itself. I wanted to cry and run away. This was ridiculous, Every second, Kyaro was furtherer away. _Grandpa Genkaku. I tried. _Tears blossomed down my cheeks and I cried silently. I couldn't cry in front of Riou. I just couldn't. I wanted to be proud,

I wanted to look after Pilika, I really did. I saw her face, the eyes always unhappy no matter how happy times could be. I wanted to make her forget of all the bad things and make her smile. For her to talk again and laugh. I could adopt her one day. And Riou, Jowy and I could live a small life far away from war. My fantasies filled me everyday but I knew it would never happen. I cared for Pilika like a doll. I told her embarrassing stories. And I told her of my favourite bed time stories. I wanted to be her big sister or mother. But I didn't know. That rejection would loom so soon. And Pilika found Jowy again, the memoru she couldn't banish. And the memory which prevented me from reaching her. I felt useless. That as Riou could do so many things on his own. And Pilika didn't even need the help of Nanami. I was just… there now. I cried that night that Shu sent Pilika to Jowy. Because I knew she was better there. I was angry at Shu for sending her. Because I always thought, I was so close to getting rid of the memory. I could've taught her to speak again. But when she returned to Jowy, I knew. I knew she would be happier. Her eyes would be bright again.  

I wanted to help Riou recapture Matilda. That was my greatest objective. And as I heard them say "We'll fight of the soldiers. Riou, Nanami. Go burn the flag. I didn't think anything would happen that day. I felt victory in my heart. And we ran down the halls to meet Jowy. He stood there in his kingly clothes. He looked so grand. And I wanted to hug him and shake him. And ask what he'd been doing. Laugh again and talk. I didn't want a war between Riou and Jowy. I had so many plans for us three. Before I knew it, Lord Gorudo had appeared. It surprised me at first, because I was still trying to recover from my tears. Quickly I drew my weapon ready to fight. _Watch Riou. What Grandpa Genkaku taught us!_ I hit the first arrow, easy. The second one was knocked away. But as I hit the third, tears sprung again as I thought of Riou and Jowy. An arrow; a bright red one soared and hit me. It went all slowly. I saw Riou as he tried to spring at the arrow, attempting to cover my body with his. But it didn't work. Somehow fate made it hit me. It was hell at first. The pain ripping through me. I thought that this was the time to cry. The time to scream. But my tears had gone. And only regret lingered in my heart. _Riou… Just call me Big Sister again. _I always wanted to be Riou's real big sister. I wish we were related by blood. I loved him so much as a little brother. It broke my hurt to see him cry tears over me. He said the words _Big Sister. _And I only felt a stinging trance. I felt I was to die. From the corner of my eye, I could see Jowy. I wanted to say something to Jowy. Plenty of things. Like what was he to do after this war. And if he'd ever go to Kyaro again. I saw tears slowly drifting down his cheek. I wanted to go to him and shout _Don't cry! I can't be killed easily! _But I knew it was the end for me. I couldn't feel my fingers anymore. He looked at me and I could see his eyes. Hoping some miracle would revive me again. Oh I loved him so. I really loved him. I could never tell him. He was my little brother's best friend. And I'd never tell him. He didn't deserve anyone like me loving him. The both stood proud to fight Gorudo. Both of them angry with tears. I gave myself a smile. My last picture as I died. Jowy and Riou united again for a last fleeting moment. _For me_. I could almost say they did it just for me. 

Dr Huan was rolling some bandages as I woke. _Ah You're awake. You're lucky to survive that. I thought you almost wouldn't make it. I'll go inform the others. _I wanted to scream for Riou to get in. For Viktor and Flik to share my joy. But all the energy that was in me had been drained. _Wait. _It was all I could say. What would I say to Riou? _I'm sorry for making you cry? _I didn't want to. I didn't want him to worry anymore. I didn't want him to carry burdens anymore. The weight of 107 people trusted him. It hurt me so to see him having to decide futures of people. I wanted to go back to Kyaro. I'll make a home for him. So when the war was all over. And he didn't want to do anything. I could welcome him with open arms. _Don't tell them… _It pained me to tell them to announce my death. But I didn't want anyone to think of me anymore.

I'll make a garden in the back. I'll grow lots of flowers, everything that I could think of. And I'll fix the dojo, and maybe one day I could teach people to fight. Not to fight to kill. But to fight in truly what they believed in.

And if Riou came back I'd show him what I could do. I'd make him smile with pride.

When he meets Jowy, when it is time to settle the final straw, I'll trust Riou's decision. Because he's my brother. And even though we were never related by blood, fate decided and chose him to be my little brother.

I was naïve to think that Riou wouldn't kill Jowy. But I realised many things were at stake. I wondered what happened after the war. Apparently L'Renioulle fell and now there was now united nation. What did Riou do? And what did Jowy do? I had nightmares where Jowy and Riou both died. Their blood was spilt everywhere and they died fighting each other. 

The roses in the garden didn't look too well. I had tried to water them everyday. But it didn't work. It despaired me to think that I failed. _I'll try again. _I felt lonely. It felt terrible that the many friends you made can never meet you ever again. I kind of had fun. Playing with Pilika, Laughing at Viktor. Tears welled up in my eyes. I decided to sit on the steps in front of the house, hugging my knees in deep thought. It was really sunny today. A butterfly landed on my knee for a second. It seemed to look at me curiously then fly away. I closed my eyes and I looked forward. I wish Riou and Jowy were right now heading home, holding each other's hands. And they'd smile.

I opened my eyes and saw some figures heading to my home. I leapt up, ready to receive them. They looked like Riou and Jowy. So alike. My feet started dashing. I didn't know why and how, I didn't make them dash. And I jumped and hugged Riou. Tears spilled out. I somehow knew it was him. The feel of his hair and the smell of him. It certainly was my little brother.

Welcome home Riou, Jowy 

I smiled and greeted them. Jowy gave a laugh and Riou smiled knowingly.

We're back 

They both said in unison.

It felt right. It felt wonderful. I had so many things to tell them. The roses that wouldn't grow, my attempt to clean up the house. I laughed, those things could wait till later.


End file.
